Thursday, 30 August 2012

Lessons learned about my frumpy rut!

Over the weekend we were invited to a family barbeque. Now I don't often discuss my marriage in public but I have so say that my husband protested against the t'shirt I decided to wear arguing that it was too frumpy. FRUMPY?! Well.... I told him to choose something different for me to wear bearing in mind that I am wearing a white bra and do not wish to change my underwear also! I expected him to find looking for something for me to wear as difficult as I do most mornings and offer to treat me to a shopping spree. Nope, within moments he pulled out a shirt dress from the wardrobe for me to wear instead and I have to admit that it did look a lot better than the t'shirt I had planned to wear. I need to get him to pick me out an outfit for the next day every evening before he goes to bed haha!

photo from

While we were at the family barbeque I noticed my sister in law was wearing a very plain and shapeless red and white striped t'shirt herself. She had teamed it with a pair of jeans and a messy ponytail but did she look frumpy? No, she actually looked really cool and casual. Had her t'shirt been on me it would have looked frumpy so I wondered briefly why this is, before coming to the conclusion that it must be because she is skinny and I'm short & well... not exactly skinny!

When it came to getting dressed the following day I actually felt a bit nervous. Does this look frumpy? Does that look frumpy? 

I realised that the problem is that I've been trying so hard to regain my pre-pregnancy figure I hadn't bothered to learn how to dress my post-pregnancy figure suitably and in fact, most of the clothes I used to wear I wouldn't even dream of wearing now as they'd be most inappropriate for a mum! Instead I've been hiding behind a barrage of baggy tees and leggins.

I decided it was time to learn and I thought the best way to do it would be to go out and do a spot of people watching. Try to spy people with "fuller figures" that look good and learn from that what looks good and why. I had my daughter for the day and it seemed the perfect way to get out the house on a miserable day so I took her to Lakeside - our local big shopping mall.

I bought my daughter a babyccino and myself an iced latte in Starbucks chose a window seat, took my notebook out for us both to scribble on and began my assignment. It didn't take long for my daughter to spill her babyccino all over the place and I had to clear that up. Then she began an argument with another nearby toddler which simply consisted of them shouting "no!" at each other with their limited vocabularies. Once we were all settled and my girl was happy drawing all over the notepad and me I noticed that my mind kept straying from the people watching and that I actually found it really uncomfortable, I kept worrying that I was going to get caught and scowled at!

Eventually I came to a few conclusions for my "fuller figure". Simple clothes that aren't classic items can look boring and frumpy unless they are teamed with some appropriate accessories. Also I think my problem may be that as I've been hoping to loose weight I have been reluctant to spend any money on "big" clothes so I have been buying cheap "to do" clothes in larger quantities. The t'shirt I had planned to wear to the barbeque - I had bought three of them in different colours to see me through the summer! Once I had identified this I decided to give myself a £100 budget to invest in one or two nice items to brighten up my wardrobe - not oodles of cheap leggins and t'shirts to see me through the season like I usually would.

The funny thing is that I actually found it quite hard to find those "perfect items" and I actually ran out of time before I ran out of budget! Don't get me wrong, I liked and tried on a lot of things but a lot of them simply didn't seem to suit my stumpy figure! 

I realised that In future I need to actually make some time for my personal style and go shopping properly once in a while instead of just conveniently topping up on items that I think I need when visiting the supermarket which turn out to look really frumpy! Back to the t'shirt I was going to wear at the barbeque - it was a sainsburys purchase that I had simply picked up whilst doing some groceries - I didn't even try it on. Had I done so I probably wouldn't have bought them.

Now I think I have an idea what made me look frumpy but there are probably more things, like not accessorising enough. I'd be grateful if you could share your thoughts with me! In the meantime I'm going to do a bit more research in clothes that would suit my stumpy self :-) 

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